We all know that it's important to take responsibility and not to blame. This is called being an adult. Yet, so often, we forget. Emotions take over and we find ourselves caught up in the drama.
When I am in the drama, I want to be right, and I want others to know how wrong they are. Emotionally, I don't want to step back and be honest with myself. I don't want to challenge the story I am telling myself.
I have to make myself do it. I have to remind myself that the promise of "being right" is a false promise. It is an unattainable goal in most cases. And if I see myself as the innocent person in a conflict, I have to remember that my story is a lie I tell myself.
It takes courage to self examine and a will strong enough to change the direction of your thoughts. The effort is worth it when you see the result. Moving beyond blaming makes your relationships better and you stronger. It diminishes stress and conflict in your life. It feels good to function as an adult.
William Frank Diedrich, author of Beyond Blaming
http://noblaming.com
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