Blaming is a story

Blaming is a story we tell ourselves that isn't true. We say, "That person caused me to be this way."  When in fact, "being this way" is what I am choosing to be.

If that is true, then why is it so hard to get past "being this way." and make a change? It is because our stories about ourselves are so powerful and convincing. But actually, it's just a story. A false identity.

"I'm not good enough."  or  "Nobody wants me." My parents made me feel this way.  My teachers did it to me. Those are stories and identities we have taken on.

We live them; we hide from them; we avoid them with drink and drugs. We feel hurt or angry if we allow ourselves to feel at all.

Whatever your identity/story may be, feel it. Face it by feeling it and being it. Then gently and firmly make a decision that you've had enough of it. After all, it's only made up. Make up something different.

How about:  "Of course people want to be with me." (work with me, play with me, hire me, date me, whatever) "And furthermore, I want to be with me!" Now feel that. Feel it and be it. Imagine it is true.
This is not a comparison between you and others. No need to compare. You just are who you are.

So is it true? Is that who you are?  Remember, our stories about ourselves are powerful and convincing.  Actually, you are quite magnificent, and powerful. Are you ready to step up and be who you really are? That is completely (100%) up to you.

William Frank Diedrich
author of Beyond Blaming and Adults at Work,
http://adults-at-work.com