Accountability is what is missing today. Blame takes its place. Accountability is at the beginning. You clarify the goal and make a commitment to produce a result. Blaming comes after the fact. Maybe the goal was clear; maybe it wasn't. Blame usually rewrites history. It is a way of organizing facts along with some fiction to create a story that makes someone wrong.
Blame is great sport and is very effective at creating fear in others. We blame our political leaders, but we don't hold them accountable. Political parties blame each other but they don't hold each other accountable.
Accountability is based on clarity, commitment, and cooperation. It is unconditional. If you succeed, acknowledge those who helped you. If you fail, own it. Look at it closely and learn from it.
If you set a goal to lose 30 pounds, you are accountable. If you don't lose the weight, there is no one to blame. Understand why you didn't lose it. You preferred comfort food over losing weight. You chose not to exercise. What can you learn? Perhaps losing weight is not that important -- not as important as eating comfort food and sleeping in. If that is true, then don't set the goal. Wait until it is important and you really can commit. Why torture yourself with guilt and blame?
We promise too easily. Commit and be accountable. Look at your goals and ask yourself if you are accountable. Your marriage; your work; your health; your spiritual path; your financial well-being -- are you doing what needs to be done to succeed? The point here is not whether you succeed -- it is whether or not you are accountable. Succeed or fail, there is everything to learn and no one to blame.
William Frank Diedrich is the author of Beyond Blaming and the upcoming Adults at Work.
http://noblaming.com
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